Episode
Three
Punchline
Everything Went
Dark
(Performed by Rich Fulcher on the Banjo)
Rod Rod Hubba Hubba Ding Dong Doh,
Hubba Hubba Do All Day.
Rod Rod Hubba Hubba Ling Long Lark,
Everything Went Dark!
Everybody!
Rod Rod Hubba
Hubba Ding Dong Doh,
Hubba Hubba Do All Day.
Rod Rod Hubba Hubba Ling Long Lark…
Silver Cowboy Boots
(Sung by Matt Berry and the Shop Assistant)
Matt:
I've rolled with the punches,
Graduated from the school of hard knocks.
Seen the stars at the end of a fist,
I tried to walk away but I could'nt resist.
But that was the way til-, now.
You put a spell on me, and I don't know how.
Asst:
Something here is strange,
but I think I am in love.
Matt:
It's taken me some time,
I see heaven from above.
Asst:
As soon as you walked in,
Well, I knew you were the one.
Both:
I'm the only guy who-
Can express himself in song.
Asst:
I can't be in love if it's plastic,
To live on my own just seems tragic.
Both:
But we'll raise our swords high when our day comes,
Here we have gold where we had bronze.
Stick!
Stick! Stick!
(Sung by Matt Berry)
Stick!
Stick! Stick!
Got to be Quick! Quick! Quick!
Buy your kids a Stick! Stick! Stick!
You can use
it like a sword or a knife or a fork.
But you got to be Quick! Quick! Quick!
And buy your kids a Stick!
Alan
Ford:
BUY YOUR KIDS A FUCKING STICK!
Sounds of Love
(Sung by Matt Berry)
I'm taking control of your body
Bless my soul, I'm so hungry.
Soothing it down, touching it up.
You're making those sounds…
The sounds of love!
Chorus
Taking control of your body,
Bless my soul, I'm so hungry.
Soothing it down, feeling it up.
You're making those sounds…
Oh-oh!
The sounds of love!
Cursing with The
Bronze Cabaret
(Sung by Matt Berry and Rich Fulcher)
Fuck
-
Fuck -
Fuck, Shit -
Fuck, Shit -
Fuck, Shit, Horse-piss -
Fuck, Shit, Horse-piss -
Fuck, Shit, Horse-piss, Son of a two-bald bitch...
Fuck, Shit, Horse-piss, Son of a two-bald bitch, Mother-fucker,
Fuck, Shit, Horse-piss, Son of a two-bald bitch, Mother-fucker,
Fuck, Shit, Horse-piss, Son of a two-bald bitch, Mother-fucker,
Fuck, Shit, Horse-piss, Son of a two-bald bitch, Mother-fucker -
I can't be
in love if it's plastic,
To live on my own just seems tragic,
But we'll raise our swords high when our day comes,
You thought it was gold but it was bronze.
So... Get here in time, when our day comes,
You thought it was gold but it was bronze,
Get here in time, whe-en our day comes,
You thought it was gold but it was bronze.
Fuck,
Shit, Horse-piss, Son of a two-bald bitch, Mother-fucker,
Fuck, Shit, Horse-piss, Son of a two-bald bitch…